Poetry by Tejay Joe: The Agreement

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Unlike any agreement written with time

Ours had no time frame but had infinite ends

Unlike any lawyer in suit and tie

Ours was a God, in charge of earth and sky

Documentation was on the tablets of our hearts

With clauses even we weren’t sure about

 

Twelve minus one

Does it matter?

Except to the God who created matter

To the one who makes things beautiful in his time

He gave me someone that would love me till the end of time

 

Twelve months

Does it count?

Not like pennies or change in my account

But to you who loved me without discount

I say I love you even as our relationship dismounts

 

As you hold me in my despair

I’m so afraid I would disappear

These memories may form the foundation for my life

Or may cause me to derail out of my mind

 

Should we stay?

Should we go?

It no longer matters

Even when I found your heart my home

And your ring my goal

You still deny me this consolation prize

Instead of vulnerability, you chose a disguise

 

Hope your happy, ten over ten

Equals one end and a temporary when

That in all my calculations of time

You might move on forgetting why

Why I existed to fill you with joy

Why you fell in love with me but chose to raise a family

 

You might live in the reality of time

But our real estate doesn’t exist in your mind

Where things burn up, move on and change

But in two hearts hell bent on making a way

 

Twelve minus one again?

Yes it may not matter

But our love making I hope would generate more matter

For you to know I don’t just want you happy

Even if you broke our agreement and called our lawyer

I’d like to think you did it was for my good

All I have are my tears as food.

 

As your death is foretold upon my happiness

This is goodbye, I’d rather I die daily than wear a black dress

Even if this body isn’t the form I hoped it would be

Telling myself you don’t exist is my new Calvary.

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